He was sitting under the shade of an ostensibly century-old tree, surrounded by various flowers bursting its colors and unwavering fragrance. Barricaded with fences that made it a four-cornered place, he claimed it to be his personal and sweet spot – for there, his thoughts didn’t seem to falter, and his memories and emotions were always in a safe shelter.
Like how the whimsical butterflies were relishing themselves in the care of flowers standing firmly against the direction of the wind, he was enjoying the cool breeze touching his skin. Far from the trivial altercation that had just happened between him and his mother, the caress of such invisible matter brought a serenity state to his mind and surroundings.
For a moment, he was able to unload his frustration and eventually cool down his ire at the commotion he had been in. For a moment, his ears were in respite from the blabbering and blasting sound his mother synchronized with her outrage. For a moment, he chose to forget he had a mother to avoid further nuisance.
A little later, he felt numbness in his legs that he stood off his chair with the desire to stretch his lower limbs. Astoundingly, as he reverted to his original position, a dainty yet mysterious butterfly came and laid itself on his thigh. He was caught off guard and was not able to move any part of his body.
He was frozen and struck by its beauty. Even more so by how its enigmatic presence, the intricate embellishment of its lustrous wings, the soft sweep of its legs, and the stance of its delicate back added majestic ambiance there was in the garden. It was such a perfect creation in a perfect environment.
Beyond a wholesome fascination, however, came with a triggering feeling of familiarity the butterfly professedly wanted to vent out of him. It was a feeling that seemed to remind him of something. Something indescribable. Something torturous. Something… He got curious that he wandered around his hippocampus to seek the answer for what seemed to be a significant matter. Yet, he failed to do so.
With determination to probe such feelings, he deliberately locked his gaze toward the butterfly and held it for a while. Subsequently, he felt his tears burning behind his eyes as the remains of the past began unfolding ahead of him.
It was her. It was the mother of his best friend. “But why was she here?” he thought. It had already been 14 months since she left Earth for heaven. The grievance and wrath toward the Covid-19 virus had already moved its way to the dungeon of oblivion. He never wanted to go back to that time. That time when everywhere and everything was bleak. That time when all he could see was his best friend profusely spilling his tears down his cheeks. That time when he could do nothing but console him.
He never showed his mourn throughout that ordeal for he thought he needed to stay and looked strong for his best friend. But deep inside, he missed Mrs. A. He missed her mac and cheese that would always be served on the table whenever he visited their house, the sound of her laugh that would always fill up every empty musical sheet in all parts of their big home, and the care and attention she showed to him as if he was her child.
Upon reminiscing these precious yet sentimental moments, he felt a pang in his heart, threatening his chest to explode. He was heaving and chasing his breath. He couldn’t contain it. He wanted to let it all out.
He jolted out of his reverie when his mother patted him on his shoulder. He found himself creating a river of tears soaking his sullen and gloomy face. Without hesitation, he threw himself to his mother and uttered the three words he had seldomly told her. He then let the avalanche crash down and sought shelter in his mother’s embrace – once a loud rustling of fall out had turned into a steady and calm atmosphere. He found home at his mother’s comfort.
He suddenly felt guilty perforating a hole in his mother when thousands of people across the globe had way more heartbreaking reasons to feel angry. He thanked God for he was fortunate his family is complete. He is still full to the brim with the love of his amazing mother, father, and sister.
He then promised and told himself, “I’ll strive to be a better son and brother, and I will cherish every single moment with them.”
He turned back to thank his friend’s mother. As he was about to touch the said butterfly, it already extended its frail and chivalric wings, preparing to take off. He could do anything but held his breath as he watched the butterfly swam through the symphony of the wind and trailed behind the copse of trees.
Looking back, he still considers it to be the most profound experience of his life.
Photo credit: MindBodyGreen
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